By Bryan Gase
I get asked a lot of times, “When is the right time to propose?” and I smile and always give the same answer. “You will know, trust me, I did.” I was 26 and had been in a few long relationships. Then I met my wife and she was the first one to ever push me to be better, to make me want to be a better person. It was only 6 months into our relationship when I proposed. Some may say that it was too soon, some may say, “What took you so long!?!” Truth of the matter is everyone is different, everyone is unique. We all have certain circumstances that we may need to get through or goals we wish to achieve..
One of my favorite questions to ask a guy, a girl, or a couple when they sit with me is, “How long have you two been together?” The reactions I receive are priceless. Some people will say 3 months. When they do tell me, there is always a smile or blush that comes across their faces. Some people giggle and some slap the other in the arm. The best part is, there is nothing to be embarrassed about. You are making a leap of faith with the person you love.
For the most part, I have come to find that the average length of time tends to be from 2 to 3 years together. Now, don’t get this twisted – I’m not saying this is the ideal time or the exact amount of time to wait, just offering some perspective. It seems like there is a comfort, a trust, a bond that has been developed in that time. You feel like you know that person inside and out. That tends to be when the moment strikes you, like a switch being turned on that says, “Hey! It’s time to do this!”
When the time is right, I encourage you to ask your friends, your family, or ask her family for recommendations on what style she likes. Heck, you can even ask her what she likes if you are worried about picking the wrong ring. You will be surprised at how excited people are to help. If you are going for the surprise, make sure you talk to people who won’t spoil it for her. This is an exciting time in your life and will be a moment you will remember for the rest of your lives. I can still see clear as day my wife’s reaction when I popped the question; It is a moment that is burned into my soul forever.
The bottom line is this – the only person who can and will know is you! If you feel the time isn’t right, then it’s not. Don’t feel pressured to do it because people say that you should. On the flip side, if you do feel the time is right, then go for it! Don’t’ be nervous about the timing or how you will do it. It will all come together when it’s right.
I wish you the best of luck when you decide the time is right and you take that next step towards the rest of your life.